1.5/5 ★ – BlooMoon's review of Paper Mario: The Origami King.

After I beat this game, I became mad that I wasted so much time beating this game. This game doesn't know what it wants to be, and that makes it an incredibly frustrating experience. It's very clear that the devs do not want turn based combat with RPG mechanics anymore, however they insist on including vague remnants of those mechanics. Why? Is it to draw old fans in with false advertising? The ring battles are bad. They are not fun or satisfying. Stopping your momentum to solve a weird ring puzzle just grinds all pacing to a halt and I hate it. At least in Color Splash and Sticker Star, battles felt like they were normal RPG battles, even if they had the same nonexistent rewards. The longer the game went on the more I found myself avoiding as many standard overworld baddies as possible. Bosses are also annoying. Every boss has one specific solution that is rather obtuse. You will probably only figure it out by painstakingly making your way to the center and trying to attack it in a way that makes sense to you, only for the game to yell at you that that won't work and you need to do something else instead. Boss battles can last a frustrating 30-40 minutes like this and none of it is fun. None of these shoed in mechanics are intuitive whatsoever, so it is very unlikely that players will figure things out in advance and get any sort of satisfaction. It ends up being a frustrating trial and error mess. Honestly I'm not sure how I powered through some of these bosses. There are real time battles in this game as well with giant "paper macho" enemies. Why not just do this? The game is making it very clear it isn't an RPG. Just ditch the turn based mechanics all together and lean into real time combat! I wouldn't be as mad because at least they wouldn't be trying to mislead desperate fans who want to see meaningful turn based combat return. Speaking of misleading desperate fans, what is with the half assed partners in this game? I'm fine with having NPCs temporarily travel with you in locations of the game. It's fun and can shake things up and make different areas feel more special. But in the context of a PAPER MARIO sequel??? They only did this so they could show characters following you around in the overworld AND in combat to make fans think partners were returning. These weird, teasing choices become more infuriating the more I think about them. So why did I play this game for 30 hours all the way to the credits? Well, there's still a lot to enjoy here. The presentation is phenomenal. Just like Color Splash before it, Nintendo has nailed the arts and crafts aesthetic, and it just looks gorgeous in HD. As with most Nintendo games, moment to moment actions are polished to a shine and feel great. Running, jumping hammering, throwing confetti. The animation and sound effects for these simple actions make them satisfying and fun. Exploring the overworld is fun. There are lots of beautiful and fun different areas and set pieces. The environments are filled to the brim with little secrets, flourishes, hidden collectibles, etc. This game is absolutely oozing charm. In fact, it's about the #1 thing it has going for it. If this game didn't impress with its jokes, style and charming set pieces, it wouldn't have gotten nearly as many switch owners talking about it. I enjoy the number of collectibles available as well as detailed trackers for each world to facilitate completion. However, as with everything else in this game, there is a downside that destroys whatever good thing it had going. There are several different areas throughout the story mode where failure will result in an INSTANT GAME OVER that boots you back to the start screen. This is a little odd but not too bad. What makes this terrible is the game is secretly tracking if you have had any game overs, and 100% completion is only attainable by beating the game with 0 game overs. That means if your hand slipped once during an escape sequence, or you chose the wrong answer in that dumb Snifit quiz in the desert, you are locked out of 100% completion. What kind of decision is that? What dev team includes detailed trackers of all their collectibles in each world to encourage 100% completion, and then turns around and adds an invisible secret criteria that players can easily lock themselves out of? As I mentioned in my sticker star review, I really wish that Paper Mario could split into two series: Paper Mario, and Mario Story. Mario Story games would be what the first Paper Mario was: a story heavy RPG with turn based combat. Paper Mario games would be what the series has been turning into: action adventure games with basic Mario characters, pretty visuals and a papercraft gimmick. Making this intentional separation would allow the devs to fully commit to the direction they so clearly want to take with this game. Everything good about this game comes from them pushing in a new direction. Everything bad comes from them refusing to commit and forcing half baked versions of old mechanics back into a game they don't work in. Every time this game starts going somewhere, or tells a good joke, or implements a good mechanic, it just makes me a little sad, because any good is bogged down by all the baffling decisions surrounding it. I played through this whole game because I wanted to like it. I liked a fair bit of it. But the more I reflect on the whole package and look back on my time with the game, the more my perspective skews negative.