2/5 ★ – Empyrean's review of Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands.

In an act of frankly unrivalled stupidity, I decided to torture myself by playing all four versions of Forgotten Sands. That’s right, each platform release is an entirely different game! There are elements shared by each, but they’re mostly separate. Let’s start with the worst: DS: 1.5/5 Very similar to The Fallen King, which I also hated. The only positive this version has is that it doesn’t have voice acting, which I’ll get to shortly. PS3: 2.5/5 The damage control version. In an obvious attempt to win back fans after the 08 reboot, Ubisoft attempt to harken back to the Sands of Time trilogy. Supposedly this takes place between SoT and WW, although you couldn’t tell. Even Battles of PoP referenced the Dahaka. Whilst this version does have a few unique and few ideas that make for some fun platforming at the end (like literally just the finale), this is probably the most boring game in the franchise. There’s no challenge, the combat attempts crowd control and fails miserably, the writing is subpar at best, and the level design is once again repetitive and dull. One of the better final bosses though. PSP+Wii: 2/5 In terms of gameplay, these two are by far the best of the bunch. There’s a good amount of challenge and they all have decent ideas and mechanics. So why the lower rating? I’ll tell you: the VA for the companion of each game made my blood boil every time she spoke and actively ruined my experiences. She wouldn’t have sounded out of place in a HoYo game, but it’s infinitely worse here. I’m getting angry just typing this. Finishing these games almost broke me and I need an extended break. I’m glad Ubi mostly retired the franchise for a while because I’m not sure I have another one in me. I can only hope this years revival is at least above “fine”.